On This Day Of Thanks

I’m finally back from my whirlwind, month long vacation / birthday month bonanza. I didn’t get sick once on my trip despite living with Mia in Honolulu when she had this crazy Hawaiian cold that wouldn’t go away. I also managed to battle off MissMarketing’s chronic bronchitis bugs in New York. Normally, a sick person could just look at me and I’ll get sick. I’m delicate like that so imagine my surprise when I didn’t get sick ONCE even though I was around a bunch of sick people. Fyi, by "sick people", I mean they were physically ill. I’m not implying that my family members and friends are social deviants or anything.

I was amazed!! Omfg!!! So naturally, I started thinking I was invincible because I’m a TOTAL NINJA.FU MASTER BAD ASS!!! …or so I thought.

I got back home the day before yesterday and found my brother sniffling and coughing. Fantastic….but I’m not scared because I’m armed with both the flu shot and the H1N1 vaccine. What could he possibly do to me that I’m not prepared for? I hung out with him for about 4 hours and didn’t bother keeping my distance. Apparently, I got a little too cocky because I woke up the next morning with a swollen lymph node and a sore throat.

I was like "…oh no No NOOOO!!!" and immediately started taking vitamin C, zinc, Airborne…but it was too late. Within a few hours, my nose was stuffed up, my throat looked like I decided to cram two baseballs by where my lymph nodes used to be and my body was experimenting with what menopause feels like by turning itself hot, cold and then back to hot again. It was fantastic.

I woke up this morning with a plugged nose. I blew my nose at work today (yes, I’m at work. Sick….it’s so much fun. You gotta try it sometime. Note the healthy dose of sarcasm) and a lot of mutant, radioactive green stuff came out. You know the color of that nuclear stick thing Homer Simpson handles during the intro to "The Simpsons"? Yeah. That’s about the color of the stuff coming out of my nose and out of my lungs. Very sexy, I know.

Yes. That lovely neon green is the exact shade of what my body’s producing in mass quantities.

But you know what? I’m thankful for all that.

Having my little brother getting me sick is something I’m grateful for because it means I’m alive. You can’t catch a cold / sinus infection / flu when you’re dead. It also means I have a family who loves me because my little brother wanted to hang out with his big sister. Apparently his germs wanted to hang out with me too. ^___^

I don’t blame them. HAA HAA HAA * cough * wheeze * hack *

Being at work sick is also something I’m thankful for because it means I have a job that provides for me. I’m also thankful for all the hand sanitizers. I’ve definitely been using them every time I stand up and sit back down.

I’m thankful that I can self impose a state of semi-isolation on myself while at work and being forced to enforce it because it means I have friends who love me and want me to be by them. I care too much for them to get them sick. Some of them are also pregnant and Auntie Bonnie can’t stand the though of possibly making my future baby friends sick either. Excuse me as I polish up my halo for a sec. Cool. Thanks. πŸ˜€

I’m not going to get to eat my Uncle’s crazy yummy turkey or Kai’s famous pumpkin pie but I’m thankful for that too because, again, I have a family who loves me and wants to spend the holidays with me. I love them too much to pass on my mutant germs to them even though sharing is caring and Tis The Season and all that.

My friend commented that it’s so typical of me to look at this situation still as being a half full glass. Well, baby, if you think the fluid in your proverbial glass is champagne, you’d see it as always being half full too! πŸ˜€

You know what else I’m grateful for? I’ll get another chance at wearing my buffet pants when Christmas comes around. I’m saving my epic pig out session for that holiday because being sick has happily robbed me of my usual desire to eat everything in sight. Yes!! Another thing to be grateful for!!!

Just like elastic waistbands. Whoever invented that is a GENIUS!!!

For all the blessings I have received, thank you.

For all the blessings I will receive, thank you.

Happy Thanksgiving, you guys!!! πŸ™‚

* gobble * gobble * cough * wheeze * aaah CHOOO!!! *



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