My Mommy Told Me Not To Talk To Strangers

My mom gave me a lot of good advice when I was little. Actually, it was more like a list of Don’t. As in :

Don’t talk with your mouth full.
Don’t run around while carrying something sharp.
Don’t be such a tomboy.
Don’t beat up the boys during recess.

Another one on her list was to refuse all things edible from people I don’t know (she must’ve known I would one day have an imaginary tapeworm by the name of Barney) and never to talk to strangers.

As I’ve grown up, I’ve managed to not do the first four on her list but the last two are kind of hard. Technically, I didn’t ACTUALLY break the whole “don’t take candy from strangers” because liquor doesn’t require me to chew on anything so I kind of let that one slide. That means I have to talk to strangers because, if you really think about it, we’re all strangers to each other at some point. 😀

Anyway. Back to the point of this post.

I normally don’t accept friend requests on Facebook unless you’re someone I actually met or have known for a long time. I’ve been online since I was 17 and a lot of my friends today are people I’ve met online. Not to sound completely weird but some of these friends I’ve had are people I’ve never actually met IRL. Yeah….we’re still online friends….bite me. I feel slightly better knowing that there are tons of people like me out there, Johnny B. Truant being one of them. He’s cool AND he’s funny! That must mean I’m cool and funny too!

So I’m a total CrackBook….I mean, Facebook fiend. I’m on it like white on rice and I’ve noticed something odd. There are people who want to be my friend and I have no idea who these people are. How the hell do they find me and why do they want to be my friend? Could it be my awesome profile pictures? That has to be it because there’s nothing else they can see of me so they have no idea how awesomely weird I really am.

It’s such a peeve when I see that I have another friend request from a complete stranger. I wish they would at least do the bare minimum like…oh, I don’t know…INTRODUCE THEMSELVES! Seriously, how hard is it to say “Hi, I see we have Random Person as a friend and you look familiar” or “I think you were that girl I spilled my drink on when I was all drunktarded the other night and I wanted to reintroduce myself when I’m sober. Sorry about the whole drink spilling thing”.

Or something to that extent. Even a simple “Hello” would be nice. When I used to major in programming, one of the programs we had to do was the “Hello World” one. Yeah. So if my ass had to sit and code something that can say “hello” to the world, your ass can type four simple letters. It’s not that hard, people.

I normally don’t add people who think having mutual friends is enough of an introduction but either my circuits have been fried today at work or I’m just morbidly curious because I added someone I didn’t know today.

The first thing I did when I added this person was to see what he had on his page (read : I wanted to see what this guy looks like). His profile looked a lot like that Toad dude from the old school Mario Bros. game. You know. That little bastard that appears when you complete a level and he gives you the double birdie as a reward for risking your ass to save the princess. What a f*cker, dude.

I loved that game. His profile pic reminded me of my happy childhood and all those days I spent playing that damn game with killer blisters on my thumbs and all. That’s why I decided to add him.

I thought it weird that there’s nothing on his page except that one photo. There’s no identifying info on this guy besides his birthday (if that’s a real date) and his list of friends.

So here’s where it gets a little weird. I noticed that they’re a bunch of girls. A lot of them are super hot. Actually, the quick glance of his list showed me that they’re all basically attractive females with my friend as one of the smoking hot ones.

Hm….so this guy’s like a collector except he likes to collect pretty girls on his friends list.

Does no one else think that’s disturbing? I remember when Human Pets was on Facebook and how that app became rather creepy after a while. And now this ToadDude. He totally falls under the category of Uber Creepy and reminds me of those really gross guys who sneak up on a group of dancing girls, decides to grind his crotch into her backside and call that “dancing” with her. Wtf.

ToadDude can at least grow some balls and be like that other guy who got to the point.

I mean no disrespect, however it would be a pleasure to add your beautiful face to my friends list.

I’m very flattered. The saying goes “Flattery will get you everywhere” except on my list of friends.

Just sayin’.

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Comments
4 Responses to “My Mommy Told Me Not To Talk To Strangers”
  1. Glow Worm says:

    I know what you mean, I regularly get friend requests without any message. When will people learn?

    • missbonnified says:

      I have no idea but I hope the answer is “soon”. When did common courtesy become UNcommon courtesy? Probably about the same time common sense also made it on the Endangered Species list. ^___^

  2. Tom says:

    As I’ve grown up, I’ve managed to not do the first four on her list but the last two are kind of hard. Technically, I didn’t ACTUALLY break the whole “don’t take candy from strangers” because liquor doesn’t require me to chew on anything so I kind of let that one slide. That means I have to talk to strangers because, if you really think about it, we’re all strangers to each other at some point. 😀

    If you never try, you’ll never know, it’s that simple. The world is birthed with horrors, but there’s also good, I think that’s where most parents are wrong with raising children with how they educate. Except children are also different creatures when being compared to teens, to adults, based on the age bracket system anyway–although people will learn and understand at their own pace…unfortunately, some just can’t keep up. What I’m saying is, it may not be as easy as I think it is to properly educate a person, based on their age, especially children…but I highly believe that a lot out there aren’t taught at all or too well for whatever reasons. About your drinks bonnie, you should just be aware that you saw the drank being made or ordered by some bartender–kids get kidnapped, adults get date raped, haha.

    Anyway. Back to the point of this post.

    I normally don’t accept friend requests on Facebook unless you’re someone I actually met or have known for a long time. I’ve been online since I was 17 and a lot of my friends today are people I’ve met online. Not to sound completely weird but some of these friends I’ve had are people I’ve never actually met IRL. Yeah….we’re still online friends….bite me. I feel slightly better knowing that there are tons of people like me out there, Johnny B. Truant being one of them. He’s cool AND he’s funny! That must mean I’m cool and funny too!

    Same here with the INTERNET FRIENDS, whom I just call real friends…there’s nothing weird about that. JK YOU’RE WEIRD BUT SO AM I. We met once but I wouldn’t exactly call that a formal meeting, although fucking awesome with Bad Santa and Lance–I just re-watched that recently and thought about that, man that movie is still awesome, haha.

    So I’m a total CrackBook….I mean, Facebook fiend. I’m on it like white on rice and I’ve noticed something odd. There are people who want to be my friend and I have no idea who these people are. How the hell do they find me and why do they want to be my friend? Could it be my awesome profile pictures? That has to be it because there’s nothing else they can see of me so they have no idea how awesomely weird I really am.

    It’s such a peeve when I see that I have another friend request from a complete stranger. I wish they would at least do the bare minimum like…oh, I don’t know…INTRODUCE THEMSELVES! Seriously, how hard is it to say “Hi, I see we have Random Person as a friend and you look familiar” or “I think you were that girl I spilled my drink on when I was all drunktarded the other night and I wanted to reintroduce myself when I’m sober. Sorry about the whole drink spilling thing”.

    Or something to that extent. Even a simple “Hello” would be nice. When I used to major in programming, one of the programs we had to do was the “Hello World” one. Yeah. So if my ass had to sit and code something that can say “hello” to the world, your ass can type four simple letters. It’s not that hard, people.

    There could be numerous reasons as to why people do what they do. I personally used to browse through people and I still do from time to time, just out of boredom. Most times I won’t ever say shit, but then sometimes I see someone I find to be interesting enough to send a message to and it goes from there. As time went by though, I honestly just got tired of doing that and I dunno if that makes me a bad person or what, simply cuz I don’t feel like expressing myself in that sorta way anymore, it’s all the same. So what I started doing instead was JUST that, if I saw someone I was remotely interested in, I would just ADD them. Now here’s my take on that, I don’t keep anything of mine private on the internets as far as those sites go…so they don’t have to add me, they can browse through it and knock themselves out. Based on whatever information is available, most people will make a brief judgment or even a full one for if they even want to add me based on shit like that, whether it’s the photo’s or whatever the fuck else. It’s as if I put that in their hands, if they’re interested, they can add me, if not, don’t add me. Now here’s what I do if they do add me. It’s pretty random, sometimes I may send a message to say something, but shit, nowadays with all of these fancy TWITTER/BULLETIN type of shits, I start commenting there because chances are, it’s not the same typical crap–it’s on something personal about themselves or something completely random, and it gets started there the same as it would or differently even from an introduction type of thing. Now I understand that most people wouldn’t even know that, and most probably don’t do it with my personal complex, but there’s a piece of mind if that makes any sense to you. I’m just bored of the same old shit, I wanna make changes, try new shit, spice it up. It also helps to weave out through people who are idiots or just can’t understand or don’t care to as well…so many people will make judgments on you for just the way you look, or other simpleton based shit, and that’s that, so why even waste the time to say “hello” or “hi” if some can’t or won’t get beyond those other things? There’s way too many factors and possibilities with human interest and differences to even fully get into that, though, it’s all person to person–I personally just needed to order something else from the menu, haha. That’s the beauty about internet meeting, the ADD and DENY buttons are oh so simple, heh.

    I normally don’t add people who think having mutual friends is enough of an introduction but either my circuits have been fried today at work or I’m just morbidly curious because I added someone I didn’t know today.

    The first thing I did when I added this person was to see what he had on his page (read : I wanted to see what this guy looks like). His profile looked a lot like that Toad dude from the old school Mario Bros. game. You know. That little bastard that appears when you complete a level and he gives you the double birdie as a reward for risking your ass to save the princess. What a f*cker, dude.

    I loved that game. His profile pic reminded me of my happy childhood and all those days I spent playing that damn game with killer blisters on my thumbs and all. That’s why I decided to add him.

    I thought it weird that there’s nothing on his page except that one photo. There’s no identifying info on this guy besides his birthday (if that’s a real date) and his list of friends.

    So here’s where it gets a little weird. I noticed that they’re a bunch of girls. A lot of them are super hot. Actually, the quick glance of his list showed me that they’re all basically attractive females with my friend as one of the smoking hot ones.

    Hm….so this guy’s like a collector except he likes to collect pretty girls on his friends list.

    Does no one else think that’s disturbing? I remember when Human Pets was on Facebook and how that app became rather creepy after a while. And now this ToadDude. He totally falls under the category of Uber Creepy and reminds me of those really gross guys who sneak up on a group of dancing girls, decides to grind his crotch into her backside and call that “dancing” with her. Wtf.

    Creepy people do exist man, let them live man, damn bonnie why you gotta fuck that up, fucking up their human pokemon collection you heartless bitch you, hahaha. Well yeah, they exist, whether they enjoy collecting for…whatever sick fetish it is, hideousness or just some depraved maniac coughthat’snotmecough. Could be other reasons as well, I’ve seen people create fake profiles just to mastermind a collection and to then re-direct it back at themselves to make their real selves seem popular…or it could be for spamming purposes, whether it’s someone manually behind the wheel or just some automated program, in which case if that’s the case, then the goal is advertising and marketing, AKA money making.

    ToadDude can at least grow some balls and be like that other guy who got to the point.

    I mean no disrespect, however it would be a pleasure to add your beautiful face to my friends list.

    I’m very flattered. The saying goes “Flattery will get you everywhere” except on my list of friends.

    Just sayin’.

    And that’s what people don’t know, because in another persons eye’s, instead of creepy, they may just be that, flattered. High percent chances are though, if some dude is adding ya on the internet and you don’t know who the fuck it is, and let’s just say it’s not convincing looking spam and is real, I say that they just wanna nail ya(whether they’ll be formal/nice about it or creepy, the end result is probably the same.) or collect ya, whatever the fuck. And if it’s a female, well it’s probably spam, and if not, she’s a dyke or some EX’s psycho GF or some crap, haha.

    • missbonnified says:

      Tom, I love how I always feel like I’m having a conversation with you via comments and replies. 😀

      You’re right, the accept and deny buttons are super easy to use. I just find it really weird that they don’t even just say a simple “hello”.

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