Root Canals Suck

I had a root canal yesterday. I’m scheduled for another one next year when my benefits are replenished. Maybe I should start from the beginning.

I haven’t been to the dentist in 3 years. I have a deathly dislike of being in the dentist chair even though I loved my dentist. He’s been taking care of my teeth since I was like…3 or something.

Anyway, I recently changed dentists and discovered that I have a few small cavities, need 2 root canals and 2 crowns. * sigh *

It’s not like I don’t brush. I do. I brush at least twice a day! I floss every other day. I don’t go crazy eating candy (I don’t really like candy that much anymore after I graduated high school) and I don’t eat much refined sugar as it is.

Anyway, I bit the bullet and went in for the first root canal yesterday. I asked for a sedative because I did not want to be writhing in pain the entire time I was in the chair. Ask and you shall receive because I was goners. Thank God I have Clyde. He is a most awesome boyfriend. He took me to the dentist and even made me porridge while I was passed the f*** out on the couch once we got home.

So now it’s the first day after my traumatic event and I feel like crap. I can’t open my mouth all the way because it hurts and I’m not supposed to chew with the left side of my mouth. Eating hurts like a biznatch because the gum around the molar that got ROCKED is swollen. I feel like I got donkey kicked in the face.

I had a root canal before and was fine. I was eating a steak dinner that same night. I had all four wisdom teeth yanked out on the same day and I wasn’t in this kind of agony. I think the reason why it hurts so much is because it’s the last molar on the bottom left side of my jaw and because the canal is C-shaped. Did you know that people of Asian descent tend to have C-shaped canals? Or something like that. I was riding the benzodiazepine wave when the endodontist was telling me all this. I just remember “Asian descent” and something about C-shaped canals.

I was sent home with a prescription of antibiotics and Vicodin. For all those who don’t know me, I cannot handle drugs. Vicodin will make me absolutely crazy and then I sleep for 12 hours straight. I become violently ill and projectile vomit if I even catch a whiff of marijuana smoke. This means I just wasn’t cut out to be a druggie. F*CK YEAH!!

What was I saying? Oh yeah. So the pain isn’t relieved by ibuprofen so I took Vicodin.

On one hand, the pain is almost all gone. I still can’t fully open my jaw but at least it doesn’t feel like someone’s poking at my jaw.

On the other hand, I’m feeling super dizzy and utterly retarded. I can’t make sense of what people are saying to me on my FB wall and I can barely sit up straight. Typing is pretty fun because it’s almost like magic how it appears on the screen.

Usually, Vicodin will make me throw up but I managed to painfully eat a bowl of kimchi chigae this morning. That was yummy but painful.

I learned the following equation this morning too!

Amoxicillin + Vicodin + kimchi chigae + coffee = I am so freaking dizzy and I feel like I’ve got the IQ of a gnat.

Where’s my dislike button….

2 Responses to “Root Canals Suck”
  1. creationdivine says:

    Hilarious! I can’t handle drugs either… and I have to get a root canal. Maybe. See my post “Healing Hand of God and a Root Canal”.

    Thanks for making me literally LOL.

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