He Liked It So He Put A Ring On It
Yeah….that’s not gonna be my jam anymore. Why? Easy. I’m engaged.
That’s right. I’m engaged. A ton of you guys have been asking so here’s the story of how it happened.
That’s right. This bad boy now sits on my finger.
Isn’t it gorgeous?! I named him Bonzai Bling.
I don’t know why my engagement ring is a boy.
Once upon a few weeks ago, I noticed Clyde behaving strangely. I noticed he suddenly developed this habit of pinching my fingers one by one and/or he’ll hold my hand….and then slowly bring it right up to his face. I started referring to these moments as Clyde Impersonating The Witch In Hansel And Gretel. You know, the part where the witch was trying to feel up the imprisoned siblings to see if they’ve been properly fattened? Yeah….that’s what I felt like when Clyde was pinching and scrutinizing my hand.
My awesome detective sensors went off because I noticed he was doing these strange inspections on my left hand ONLY.
“Hm….”, I thought, “something’s going on”.
That’s when the first light bulb went off in my head. “AH HAH!!! HE’S TRYING TO SIZE ME UP FOR AN ENGAGEMENT RING!!” My birthday was right around the corner so I figured he was going to propose on my birthday. I was SOOOO SUUUURREEEE!!!
However, that clever man threw me for a loop when he gave me my birthday presents early! They were crochet hooks and books (I am obsessed) and a Hello Kitty lunch box! I loved my gifts immensely but now I wasn’t certain he was going to propose to me anymore.
I then decided Clyde was just being Clyde. You see, he has a great love for doing stuff like pretending his fingers are some creepy spider falling on my ear when we’re watching TV (he thinks it’s funny when I scream. * sigh *) and poking me in the neck. I wrote off this recent strange behavior as more of Clyde’s little bits of beloved weirdness and didn’t think about them anymore.
We watched the clock turn midnight on November 17th. He said “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABE” and gave me a big kiss. I was very happy. I was also very sleepy. To me, this was already the best birthday ever because I got to ring it in with my love. Little did I know that “ring it in” was about to turn literal.
We got ready for bed. This means we’re in our pajamas. In hindsight, we matched. I had on a really old grey Old Navy shirt and my black David-And-Goliath, glow in the dark cookie pants that say “Come to the dark side, we have cookies”. He had on a grey beater and black shorts.
Very sexy. My pants glow in the dark. Haa haa haa!
Anyway, we’re in bed and he asked me if I got any presents for my birthday. I said my sister got me a purse but I had asked my friends to donate to my Team In Training fund raiser instead. I didn’t want more stuff just to have stuff because I wouldn’t know what to do with it or where to put it. It would then be a waste of their hard earned money. Besides. I have their friendship and that’s what counts.
And then things got interesting.
Screenshots Of Miss Bonnified's Mind 
Bow-chicka-bow-wow!
Oh wait. This is an engagement story. So, it’s ring, squeal, yes!, hug, cry, put on, THEN bow chicka-bow-wow. ahahahaha
….wait….how did you know….I mean, uh….