Adventures In Wedding Planning : Venue Search Hell

From little girls to full blown adulthood, most females, at some point in their life will do at least one of the following regarding their wedding day :

1. They dream about it.
2. They think about it in passing.
3. They obsess about it.

I confess to all three, especially the last one since I’m planning for my wedding. What I did not expect was to run into a pair of the most tactless people I’ve ever encountered.

You see, I called them today to give me some information about their venue. What really caught my eye was the giveaway featured prominently on their homepage. Here’s what it says in a nutshell.

“We’d like to give away a wedding to a couple who lives for their family and community but due to unforeseen reasons, cannot afford a wedding. We’d love to make their dreams come true by giving them the wedding of their dreams so that they know their acts do not go unnoticed.”

This was what caught my attention and the reason why I thought perhaps I found a place that could help Clyde and I have the wedding we’d like to have on our budget. We are paying for this ourselves. We also don’t want to go into debt or raid our retirement fund just to have an insane wedding. We don’t think that’s prudent for our situation and we wanted to be smart about how we spend our money. We’re looking at our long term future and not an awesome one-night extravagant affair. If you can afford such awesomeness, I’m very happy for you. I really truly am.

Our budget isn’t extravagant but I’ve come to terms with it. I’ve turned this into an adventure in my head and it’s taught me a lot about what Clyde and I can do once we put our heads together.

Back to how VenueSuck factors in to why I think they’re like the Wedding Grinch for me. My conversation with their manager basically amounted to the following :

1. My budget is way too small for the amount of people we’re expecting.

2. I can’t get married with such a small budget.

3. There’s no way I can afford to feed the amount of people we’re expecting, pay for a venue / photographer / florist / DJ, pay for my gown, etc etc etc with our budget.

4. Implied I cannot afford their venue or any other venue in Temecula.

5. Agreed to email me their wedding package after an incredibly horrific pause in which I did not utter a word. * this, by the way, made me feel like he was doing me some kind of epic favor. *

I hung up the phone and sat back in stunned silence. For an awful single moment, I had the following thought.

Oh, my God. He’s right. How stupid of me to think I can marry the man I love on the budget we have and expect our friends and family to share in our joy. How silly and foolish to think this dream of ours could actually be our reality.

And then I cried. I cried such bitter tears because I was so sad and in such despair. For that brief moment in time, WeddingGrinch stole my hope. But then I wiped away the last tear and realized I had crossed over from being sad to being hopping, fuming mad.

How. Dare. You. Make. Me. Cry. And. Trash. My. Hopes. For. My. Wedding.

I decided I’m going to email them and tell them exactly what I think.

To be continued.

2 Responses to “Adventures In Wedding Planning : Venue Search Hell”
  1. hotsaucemama says:

    Awe, that’s terrible. How awful. My wedding was “budget” too. When I read that the average Nor Cal wedding is $25 K I just about fainted. Mine was WAY WAY less. My dad helped a little but rest, we paid for ourselves. (I just told Jin how much our wedding cost and he was like NO WAY.) He has no idea how much it cost. Anyway, I hope you find a BEAUTIFUL venue. =) Korean buffet was an awesome and cheap option for me, that I ended up choosing! =)

    I’m so happy for you two. My only piece of unsolicited advice, appoint a “coordinator” (one of your friends) to do all the coordinating on the wedding day… that way you can enjoy the day. =) I had so much fun at the wedding, it was all due to the above advice that someone gave me. Sure, I felt like a selfish person asking for it but it was SO worth it… I think I gave her a thank-you gift afterwards.

    • Miss Bonnified says:

      Did you just say average is 25k?! Omg….yeah, our budget is definitely not 25k.

      Thanks, Mary! I think we found a place but we’re still looking to see if there’s a better deal to be had. The coordinator advice is totally great. I know I’m going to need one because I don’t want to have to think any more than absolutely necessary on that day. πŸ˜€ Hoooorraaaaaayyyyyyeeeee!! ^__^

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