Baby Snow Bunny Bonnie

My family and I have only managed an epic Family Christmas once. This was back in 2006 when we rented a cabin in Big Bear. I think we’re still recovering from it because we’ve never done this again. It was 3 days of insane snow, eating marathons, cracking out on the WALL SIZE projection TV thingy, played Gangster Monopoly (more on this story later), hustling on the billiards table and thinking alcohol was water.

We made up dances based upon dim sum dishes. I think I was Char Siu Bao…or something. I honestly don’t remember. That would be courtesy of the biggest bottles of Jack Daniels, the entire family of Patron and Grey Goose I ever did see. I didn’t know those damn things got so big! *that’s what SHE said! Aah haa haa haa!*

I also made SnowMan and his pet, SnowDuck, for the very first time. That’s also another story for another day.

The real point of this post is how I went skiing for the very first time.

I’ve never really played in the snow. I also never learned how to ski. Thank God for lessons. I looked up skiing lessons and the success rate of first timers. I was also researching what kind of gear I’d need. Luck favors the prepared mind or something like that.

I saw one of the recommended pieces were “butt pads”. No joke. Butt. Pads. Oh boy!!! An acceptable method for making my Asian bootay look bigger!! I’m all over that. All joking aside, I was really hoping I won’t be needing the buttpads I’ll considered renting too much because skiing is supposed to be easier than snowboarding.

While I really really want to learn how to snowboard, I don’t see why I should have to fork over $150 just to slide down the mountain on my ass when I can be doing that for free. Therefore, I decided to learn how to ski since I’m supposed to be able to do that at least semi-gracefully after the first lesson. That way, I will not only manage to sort of learn a new skill but my pride will be more or less intact AND I will still hopefully have the desire to pursue sports that involve snow.

Yup yup.

First things first. I am going to get used to flying down frozen terrain with sticks strapped to my feet.

After I have mastered that, I am going to master flying down frozen terrain with a modified 4×6 strapped to my feet.

Finally, after all that, I am going to master flying down frozen terrain with a modified 4×6 strapped to my feet the ENTIRE WAY DOWN the mountain ON MY FEET and not on my ass.

I couldn’t wait to go learn how to ski. I’m going to tear up and terrorize the bunny slope. Oh yeah. Me and my rental buttpads are ready.

2 Responses to “Baby Snow Bunny Bonnie”
  1. Zontiago says:

    u can do it! just go boarding, ya know ya wanna… :p

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: